The Walrus and The Carpenter

The sun was shining on the sea,
Shining with all his might:
He did his very best to make
The billows smooth and bright--
And this was odd, because it was
The middle of the night.

The moon was shining sulkily,
Because she thought the sun
Had got no business to be there
After the day was done--
"It's very rude of him," she said,
"To come and spoil the fun!"

The sea was wet as wet could be,
The sands were dry as dry.
You could not see a cloud, because
No cloud was in the sky:
No birds were flying overhead--
There were no birds to fly.

The Walrus and the Carpenter
Were walking close at hand;
They wept like anything to see
Such quantities of sand:
"If this were only cleared away,"
They said, "it would be grand!"

"If seven maids with seven mops
Swept it for half a year.
Do you suppose," the Walrus said,
"That they could get it clear?"
"I doubt it," said the Carpenter,
And shed a bitter tear.

"O Oysters, come and walk with us!"
The Walrus did beseech.
"A pleasant walk, a pleasant talk,
Along the briny beach:
We cannot do with more than four,
To give a hand to each."

The eldest Oyster looked at him,
But never a word he said:
The eldest Oyster winked his eye,
And shook his heavy head--
Meaning to say he did not choose
To leave the oyster-bed.

But four young Oysters hurried up,
All eager for the treat:
Their coats were brushed, their faces washed,
Their shoes were clean and neat--
And this was odd, because, you know,
They hadn't any feet.

Four other Oysters followed them,
And yet another four;
And thick and fast they came at last,
And more, and more, and more--
All hopping through the frothy waves,
And scrambling to the shore.

The Walrus and the Carpenter
Walked on a mile or so,
And then they rested on a rock
Conveniently low:
And all the little Oysters stood
And waited in a row.

"The time has come," the Walrus said,
"To talk of many things:
Of shoes--and ships--and sealing-wax--
Of cabbages--and kings--
And why the sea is boiling hot--
And whether pigs have wings."

"But wait a bit," the Oysters cried,
"Before we have our chat;
For some of us are out of breath,
And all of us are fat!"
"No hurry!" said the Carpenter.
They thanked him much for that.

"A loaf of bread," the Walrus said,
"Is what we chiefly need:
Pepper and vinegar besides
Are very good indeed--
Now if you're ready, Oysters dear,
We can begin to feed."

"But not on us!" the Oysters cried,
Turning a little blue.
"After such kindness, that would be
A dismal thing to do!"
"The night is fine," the Walrus said.
"Do you admire the view?

"It was so kind of you to come!
And you are very nice!"
The Carpenter said nothing but
"Cut us another slice:
I wish you were not quite so deaf--
I've had to ask you twice!"

"It seems a shame," the Walrus said,
"To play them such a trick,
After we've brought them out so far,
And made them trot so quick!"
The Carpenter said nothing but
"The butter's spread too thick!"

"I weep for you," the Walrus said:
"I deeply sympathize."
With sobs and tears he sorted out
Those of the largest size,
Holding his pocket-handkerchief
Before his streaming eyes.

"O Oysters," said the Carpenter,
"You've had a pleasant run!
Shall we be trotting home again?'
But answer came there none--
And this was scarcely odd, because
They'd eaten every one.

~~ Lewis Carroll

I love this poem. It is from Through the Looking-Glass and What Alice Found There, written in 1872. My interpretation of this crazy poem is that the Walrus and the Carpenter asked the Oysters to walk with them along the beach knowing the whole time they were going to eat them. The older oysters refused, knowing what was going to happen But the young oysters didn't know any better and so they eagerly followed the Walrus and the Carpenter thinking they were going to have a pleasant walk and talk along the beach, only to meet their sad fate along with a loaf of bread. I don't eat oysters myself but I have heard they are delicious!   

No News is Good News

I consider myself to be up on current events. It wasn’t always this way, and I’m not sure when that changed. I can remember being in my 20s and the last thing I would watch on TV or listen to on the radio was a news broadcast. Maybe it changed with the advent of the “24 Hour News Cycle”, I don’t know.

Yesterday’s big story was the charge of cheating on the Olympic Badminton team. I didn’t even know this was an Olympic sport and for such hell to be raised over them cheating just left me gobsmacked. Apparently they were throwing games to get an easier draw in the finals. I’ve been told that this happens in Soccer quite frequently. In soccer, that makes sense to me, but in badminton? Really?

Then there was the story of needles in the airline sandwiches. Needles! What kind of person does such a thing I wondered? They declared it wasn’t a terrorist act. Really? You don’t say? This is not something that would have entered my mind first off – “Oh, needles in airplane sandwiches, must be terrorists!” Who ever it was that did this was just some sick person. They deemed it to be a “prank”. A prank? Ok, I think it’s a little more serious than a prank but not serious enough to suspect terrorism…just saying.

Then there is the uplifting story of the girl who lifted a car off of her father and gave him CPR and saved his life. The incident happened in the family’s garage. While I’m glad her dad is ok, and impressed that she saved his life, my first question was “How did the car get on top of him in the first place, in the family garage of all places?” But all is well that ends well. The girl still has her daddy though they didn’t mention what kind of shape the car was in.

There seems to always be something going on and none of it is usually very good. There are a lot of days when I just simply don’t watch the news because it seems to all be bad. I have a suggestion. I think once or twice a week, all the news stations, including the 24 hour a day cable ones, should take a day or two and only report good news! Imagine a broadcast filled with only good new stories: A country was saved from famine and poverty, a war was over when negotiations were reached, or better yet, a war was avoided because the parties came to an understanding of each other,  all abandoned dogs and cats were taken in by loving families, a cat saved it’s owners life by dialing 911 and meowing into the phone, a dog pulled someone to safety after the person fell and was hanging on a cliff’s edge, the garbage collectors in New York City picked up all the trash bags in the street and for once the city is sparkling clean, a religious conference was held with all the people in the world of different faiths and everyone decided to just “get along”, all the spammers and hackers in the world were captured and forced to do community services. These are the stories that I would like to hear about.  

I often wonder what it will be like in 200, 500, 1000 years from now, if there are still people on this planet, if they will pull these old news stories and wonder “What were they thinking?” or if they will be impressed with our ability to find some news, somewhere, 24 hours a day, 7 days week, even if most of it was in fact bad. Maybe some executive from some broadcasting company somewhere will read this blog and take my suggestion. A girl can hope can’t she?